Quotes from Video Game Ads

Recently I was mailed a complimentary copy of Next Generation, a magazine devoted to computer and video games. As I skimmed the ads for the latest video games, it struck me how things have changed over the years. Here are some quotes from the ads:

"The burning sensation you feel is from your broken ribs, not some fireball."

"...whether you're kicking someone's butt or getting yours kicked."

"Sometimes your best friends can be your worst enemies."

"Forget about that intergalactic brotherhood crap...If it's on radar, it's toast."

"The lucky ones are dead...her father went berserk and blew away a hospital full of patients."

"Kiss your butt good-bye..."

"Hit pedestrians, outrun police cars and get gunned down in a drive-by shooting...what LA's really like."

"We provided the music to drown out the screams."

"...the nipple surfing has never been better."

"The meek shall inherit Hell."

"Die, human scum."

"Build it. And they will come. Then you can kill them."

"Forget about fields of dreams...It's more like little slaughter-house on the prairie."

"The force of evil has an ugly face. The force of good has an even uglier one."

"Your ship has been overrun by aliens. Your comrades-in-arms have been captured. And your souffle has been ruined."

"Barf bags not included."

"Turn the other cheek. And it will be ripped from your face."

"Love thy neighbour. Wreck his car."

"It will take brains. It will take guts. It will take muscle. It will take whatever it can from your body and feed upon it."

"Finally, baseball without the chili dog farts."


Return to Kim Moser's Generic Home Page.
Copyright © 2017 by Kim Moser (email)
Last modified: Thu 22 February 2007 04:36:51